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I have 60 drafts in my blog queue — 61 if you include this post I just started. Lately, I have been writing less and more — writing less often but writing more words in longer posts that I then hesitate to publish. I find myself wishing I could write anonymously — which might make me more willing to click on “publish” when I have gone beyond draft to done. Instead, I fail to publish for some reason or another.
I’ve also considered renaming my blog or starting a new one with a different name as an anonymous author. “Sound Off: Wait Did I Say that Out Loud?” is a fun idea but not particularly accurate. It was coined by a friend in grad school, who knew me by my maiden name and suggested “Souders Sounds Off” to be alliterative and assonant. I adjusted the title to simply “Sound Off” with the added “Wait Did I Say that Out Loud?” because in the early days of blogging, even exposing my well-written, carefully considered, second thoughts seemed risky enough to be considered sounding off. Now? Not so much.
If I were simply spouting off whatever I thought, I’d have a lot more blog posts published and none in draft form. However, I am careful. In many ways, I am less than honest. I may rant and rave inside but manage enough decorum to portray something entirely different outside. I may write posts confessing my personal struggles but fear publishing them because they may cause a fellow Christian to stumble or may bring me judgment. I may even write about other people in a non-favorable light — and so don’t publish because, as Mom always said, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”
Plus the Bible says, “Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise; When he closes his lips, he is considered prudent” (Proverbs 17:28).
Which doesn’t exactly give me an incentive to open my metaphorical mouth to “Sound Off,” now does it?
So while I’m not publishing much these days, I am writing — and thinking — about blogging. And it might be time for a change. Any suggestions?