Category: dementia
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What If You Fail to Be Who You Thought You’d Be?
This post is about friends who help us to be the person we’d like to be, told through my experiences with both failure and grace.
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Shades of Death: When You Lose a Loved One to Alzheimer’s Disease
When you lose someone by Alzheimer’s, you lose her progressively. Both you and the one you love experience shades of death.
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For the love of mom…
My mother has loved me well. I will remember that as she remembers less and less — and love her well in return. I hate Alzheimer’s disease.
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If a gift falls in the forest…
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is near enough to hear it, does it make a sound? If a gift falls into the hands of someone who immediately forgets she’s received it, does it make an impact? I have to admit I have to remind myself that there is joy in…
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If she only knew…
Sometimes it’s better not to know. For instance, when your husband thinks the dress you wore to work that day makes your hips and hind end look larger than life, you’d rather he tell you after work, not on a lunchtime date when you have an entire half day yet to work while wearing it. But that…
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The reports of her pending death are greatly exaggerated…
It was on Friday that the texts regarding funeral plans flooded my phone Texas-style. My poor sister-in-law was working and so didn’t retrieve any messages until her phone reported 43 new messages — many regarding my siblings’ plans for my mother’s cremation details and our subsequent “celebration of life.” My sister-in-law scrolled through them to find the message…
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“Bootiful” and a “looker”…
A few weeks ago, I wrote about boots — shallow topic, I know — but it got me thinking about something deeper. Since I had mentioned my friend Kathy in the post, I thought it only right to share the link to the post with her (and hope she wasn’t offended by my references to her summer…
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A throwback at Christmas…
Last night, my oldest sister sent a text that included the photo at left, above, and the sentence, “Recognize anything besides Tal in this photo?!?!” At first glance, the precious photo merely captured the Christmas card my nephew Tal and his little family sent this year — though not to my mailbox. (Hmmm…) But my eyes…
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Singing to free the hostage…
Writing about my “hostage situation” in McDonald’s made me think of my father’s week-long experience as a McDonald’s hostage — at least in his mind. The day after my father turned 76, he attempted to use his foot to shift a box in the garage. He lost his balance and his mind in the process. The fall broke…
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Sara: Don’t call Mom at work…
I made the mistake of calling my mother. I was on my lunch break from work; she was safely ensconced in her memory care facility where she receives great care but continues to lose her memory. I paced a shady sidewalk while I conversed with her. By the time I hung up and reached for the door…
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An afghan as a symbol of regret…
My husband noticed something was wrong. At first I hesitated. Then I told him, “No, it’s stupid.” “I can tell something is wrong, what is it?” “You’re going to think this is stupid. Actually, it is stupid. Ridiculous… [long pause] “… Last night, I dreamed of an afghan.” Lest he think I meant an Afghan…
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At a loss for words…
When my mother was first diagnosed with dementia, she had word-finding and organizational issues; now she has people-placing and event-remembering ones. I spent a mere 20 minutes Sunday talking to my mother before she was called, early, to dinner at the memory-care facility where she lives. The first ten minutes of conversation were so muddied,…
All Things Work Together 